the voice of great antiquity

Oct 15

NWoR, (Novel Wrestling of Rochester) is a new wrestling promotion being built in Rochester, New York to compete with Upstate Pro Wrestling. The business is still in the formative stages. Right now, we’re looking for writers who can contribute as much as needed to writing six months of story lines, angles, characters, etc. (Note: The product needs to be written to represent the themes that NWoR places emphasis on, as described below.)

NWoR is very much in the style of Vince Russo - that is, there’s a particular emphasis on angles, characters, etc. To accomplish this, there needs to be heavy emphasis on characters and stories that will get attention from the fans. One way to accomplish this is to do something “novel” - that is, to take on subject matter that, traditionally, has not been fodder for promotions in the past. I’m referring, of course, to conspiracy theories, and related subjects.

Some characters already created are:

The Evil Lizard Bankers (a tag team based on the Jewish conspiracy theory that the world is controlled by Jews, as well as the idea that they’re really reptoids who are descendants of ancient aliens. They’ll come to the ring with iguana masks on, as well as black hats and grey beards, and they’ll hold money bags with dollar signs on them.)

Dr.s Don and Dan Paul (Parody of Dr.s Ron and Rand Paul. This tag team will be the arch-enemies of the Evil Lizard Bankers.They’ll wrestle in standard wrestling singlets and carry American and Gadsden flags.)

Alex Clones (Parody of Alex Jones. Will talk with a thick Texan drawl. Character will not be that much different than the real Alex Jones. Will wrestle in standard trunks.)

Greg Beck (Parody of Glenn Beck. Mortal enemy of Alex Clones. Character will wear coke bottle glasses, have blonde hair, cry throughout promos, and bring a big chalkboard with him to the ring.)

The Drones (Another tag team. The Drones, Drone #1 and Drone #2 are actually robots. Wrestlers will wear some silver colored, metallic looking costume that looks “robotic.” The Drones will be managed by Barry Bizarro, a parody of Barry Soetoro, i.e. Obama. Barry will carry a big remote control with an antenna, like the kind you’d have for a remote control car. The gimmick will be that Barry is controlling the Drones while they’re wrestling. Barry Bizarro will also do the talking for this tag team.)

David Dike (Parody of David Icke. Will talk with a British accent. Gimmick will be that, every time he goes out to the ring, he’ll try and talk his way out of the match because of his arthritis. When that doesn’t work, he’ll wrestle, then, somehow, he’ll find a moment to put on a magnetic bracelet or tinfoil hat which will give him superpowers, i.e. He’ll “Hulk up” and be able to win the match.

Todd Cruise (Parody of Senator Ted Cruz. Gimmick will be that he gives exceedingly long promos about crazy nonsense that has nothing to do with anything. This is a parody of when Senator Cruz, in September 2013, delivered a twenty one hour speech to filibuster the Senate into defunding ObamaCare. His speech included parts where he read Dr. Seuss books.)

Hollarina (Pronounced as “Holla” and “Rena.” Character is a rapper who wears a pink ballerina leotard and tutu. Not really political. Basically is just a ripoff of John Cena, and maybe Brodus Clay.)

” —

Wrestling Promotion Looking For Writers

i mean it can’t be THAT much worse than tna

Oct 02

fatshawnkemp:

Weird doctored eyes on a ‘79 Giants Prospects card.

fatshawnkemp:

Weird doctored eyes on a ‘79 Giants Prospects card.

Sep 30

dayan:

Arriving in New York, a year ago today.

Arriving in New York, two years ago today.

dayan:

Arriving in New York, a year ago today.

Arriving in New York, two years ago today.

Sep 28

say what you will about greenpoint circa 2014, but there’s still plenty of room in it for 24-year-old trusties in ugly starter condos AND the anti imbedded mossad partymobile

say what you will about greenpoint circa 2014, but there’s still plenty of room in it for 24-year-old trusties in ugly starter condos AND the anti imbedded mossad partymobile

[video]

Sep 23

i take that back! sicodélico is the one who rules 

(via Lucha Libre Magaine Covers Of The 1970s | Flashbak)

i take that back! sicodélico is the one who rules

(via Lucha Libre Magaine Covers Of The 1970s | Flashbak)

goddamn tinieblas rules
(via Lucha Libre Magaine Covers Of The 1970s | Flashbak)

goddamn tinieblas rules

(via Lucha Libre Magaine Covers Of The 1970s | Flashbak)

Sep 22

Hakeem Olajuwon couldn’t believe he got into that fight with Antonio McDyess. “I fell into the trap of Satan,” he said. “My reaction was in the heat of the moment. It was Satan at work and I gave in. I thought I’d learned to control my emotions as I got older. It shows none of us is immune.” As for being fined and suspended, Olajuwon said, “I was happy the league did what it did.”

Asked his take on Olajuwon’s position, Charles Barkley said: “Satan? I live the life of Satan. Satan’s one of my brothers: Darrell, John and Satan.”

” — Jamison, Lafrentz Top Pros’ Wish List - Page 2 - Chicago Tribune

Sep 15

http://nickminichino.tumblr.com/post/97567793351/snfprtch-the-cia-funding-art-in-the-50s-doesnt -

snfprtch:

The CIA funding art in the 50s doesn’t mean that that art is inherently reactionary! It means the government thought they could use it to repurpose an old aesthetic ideology to consolidate cultural power! And it didn’t really work in a concentrated way!

#knowing who funded what…

can’t wait for 30 years from now when we’ll be reading the same posts about the nefarious connection between leroy neiman and the NFL

(Source: ezrapoundinthetardis)

Sep 14

[video]